"Criticism is necessary and useful; it is often indispensable; but it can never take the place of action, or be even a poor substitute for it. It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat.”

—Theodore Roosevelt

There has been so much said and written regarding Invisible Children’s Kony 2012 effort over the last month, and there will be more said and written with the launch of their “Cover the Night” campaign. While there have been some thoughtful critiques as well as thoughtful responses to those critiques, there have also been plenty who have been at best, unhelpful and cynical, and at worst, venomous in their criticism. 
 

A common criticism made about the Kony 2012 effort has been that it is nothing more than a shallow awareness campaign inviting a “slactivism” or “bandwagon” response. I’ve previously posted my thoughts on bandwagons HERE.
 

In regard to awareness being “shallow,” I say; “so what?” Most of us get to the deeper water by entering in through the shallows. I don’t know many effective activists (who are STILL activists) who just jumped in at the deep end. Those who do, usually don’t swim for very long. They are beat down by waves of adversity or are overwhelmed by how deep, dark and murky the waters of complexity are. They drown with good intentions. Good intentions don’t make great life preservers. 

Let’s be honest. We usually enter the world of activism through the shallow water. That’s smart activism. We wade in slowly and thoughtfully, getting used to the temperature and “feel” of the water before going deeper. This approach also gives us time to receive some swimming lessons from those who have been swimming in these waters for a long time. What we need are fewer critics and more mentors. Those who have the maturity to teach, suggest and guide rather than criticize, discredit and disqualify.
 

The coach who can teach and correct while encouraging and mentoring is much more effective then the coach who is constantly telling you that you suck and that you’re doing it all wrong.
 

Stephen Colbert wrote; “Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the farthest thing from it. Because cynics don’t learn anything. Because cynicism is a self-imposed blindness, a rejection of the world because we are afraid it will hurt us or disappoint us. Cynics always say no. But saying “yes” begins things. Saying “yes” is how things grow. Saying “yes” leads to knowledge. “Yes” is for young people. So for as long as you have the strength…say “yes'.”
 

So maybe you find yourself standing on the shore, looking for an entry point into the water. The deep end looks intimidating. Begin by wading in through the shallows. If you find yourself in the shallow water, look to those who have been swimming for a long time…and learn as you venture into deeper waters. And lastly…if you are in deep water…stick together. It’s not safe to swim alone. There are sharks in the water. But wherever you find yourself…by all means, say “yes”.
 

Rob

President & Co-founder, Love146
Follow me on Twitter HERE

In just a few short days one of the most anticipated sporting events in America will be taking place: The Super Bowl between the New York Giants and the New England Patriots.  

In American football there is a debate over what is more important in winning a game… a better defense or a better offense? My opinion? I don’t know. 

What I DO know is that just this week, a Giants fan took ‘defense’ to a whole new level. I was contacted by a business owner who is a self described Giants fan and who was planning on going to the Super Bowl this weekend. He said he intended on spending about $10,000 to do so. But a few days ago he felt very strongly that he wanted to donate that $10,000 to support Love146's work instead. His desire to help protect and defend vulnerable children was greater than his desire to see an offensive line protect and defend a quarterback. And that to me…is a HUGE win! 

PS: Okay Patriots fans…let’s see what YOU can do…

Amazed and grateful,

Rob

President & Co-Founder
Follow me on Twitter HERE

I’ll never forget the first time that my youngest son recognized that I was a different color than him. He was about 5 years old. We were sitting on the couch cuddled together with our arms all tangled up. His beautiful brown arm and my very white arm looking like a half baked pretzel. He was just staring at our arms, and I could tell he was thinking really hard.

Finally he looked up at me with complete sincerity, and with sympathy said; “Dad…you’re REALLY white”. He felt sorry for me. It was both a very funny moment and a beautiful one. He was completely innocent, untouched by any kind of prejudice. We have obviously had many great discussions since then. Being a multi-racial family affords natural opportunities all the time.

Years later, I remember coming home one day to find my son sitting on the floor looking through one of our photo books on the life of Martin Luther King Jr. The book was sitting on his lap open to the photos of the Birmingham riots. He sat staring at the infamous photo of people being blasted with fire hoses and attacked by police dogs because of the color of their skin. When I walked in, he looked up at me with the most heartbreaking, quizzical look of confusion. His eyes pleading for an answer…”Why?” His look just about brought me to my knees.

How do you explain hatred and violence to a child, when it doesn’t make any sense to begin with? Just try explaining it, and you’ll find out how the explanations begin to sound as lame and insane as the actual acts and attitudes you’re attempting to unravel.

In our work with Love146 the question of “Why?’ rages daily. Why do people prey upon the most vulnerable and innocent among us? Why are we not doing more to stop the exploitation of children?  Why do we often remain bystanders while so many suffer? 

I wonder if the answer to the “why” questions has to do with love.

In the movie, Midnight in Paris, the character that plays Ernest Hemingway says; “All cowardice comes from not loving…or not loving well, which is the same thing.” Poet Elizabeth Alexander wrote: “What if the mightiest word is love, love beyond marital, filial, national. Love that casts a widening pool of light. Love with no need to preempt grievance.”

No doubt that these are extreme times. What we desperately need are extremists. Not right wing or left wing extremists. Not religious or political extremists. But the kind of extremist that Martin Luther King Jr. wrote about from that small jail cell in Birmingham; “So the question is not whether we will be extremist but what kind of extremist will we be. Will we be extremists for hate or will we be extremists for love?”

I hope we choose love. For my children, and all children’s sake. Even for our own sake.

Rob

President & Co-founder, Love146
Follow me on Twitter HERE

We sat around the lunch table at Love146 today arguing about end-of-year appeals...

Frankly, I think that year-end appeals from charities have become like white noise. And using the “last chance for a tax deductible donation” tactic feels at best, awkward and at worst…manipulative. I contended that we shouldn't add to the noise. But other staff pointed at the gaps in our budget and argued that we should offer you the chance to give if it's a good time. It was looking like a potential mutiny and I was clearly over ruled.

So…I'll keep it simple and have only two things to say: first, sorry to bug you, and second, give money if you can.

No, please- despite my reluctance to ask at this time, we could really use it to prevent kids from being trafficked and care for survivors.

Hope your holidays have been filled with wonder and love… end-of-year appeals and all,

Rob

President & Co-founder, Love146
Follow me on Twitter HERE

“Hopelessness is not the opposite of hope. Fear is.”- Margaret Wheatley

The fall of 1961 was marked by turbulent times in the U.S. The entire nation was gripped with fear. President Kennedy was advising American families to build bomb shelters to protect them from atomic fallout in the event of a nuclear exchange with the Soviet Union. A year later, the world was on the brink of full-scale nuclear war during the Cuban Missile Crisis.

It was during this time that my parents found themselves having to make one of the toughest decisions of their lives. They were strongly considering having a second child but were afraid of bringing a child into the world, which seemed to be going crazy. They have told the story of how, with limited income, they literally came down to deciding between spending the money on building a bomb shelter or having a baby. Having to choose between fear…and hope. I am thankful they chose hope. The baby they ended up bringing into the unstable and chaotic world, exactly 49 years ago today… turned out to be me.

I think all of us who wrestle with the brokenness, beauty and mess of the world we live in, face the constant tension of giving into fear and hopelessness, or love and hope. Rebecca Solnit writes; “To hope is to gamble. It’s to bet on the future, on your desires, on the possibility that an open heart and uncertainty are better than gloom and safety. To hope is dangerous, and yet it is the opposite of fear, for to live is to risk.”

So, if given the choice of whether to give in to fear or to give in to hope…Give in to hope. You never know what you might give “birth” to.

Rob

President & Co-Founder, Love146

Follow me on Twitter HERE